Mom in Cancerland

Friday, May 8, 2009

Small gifts

Four years ago, I sat at my goddaughters first communion. My hair was ultra short just barely ready for sharing with the world after chemo. She looked so beautiful and innocent and I just lost it. There are very few times in my life when I can remember not being able to control my emotions, but this was one of them. I felt not just tears, but overwhelming sobs beginning. I knew I had to get out of that pew asap. I finally got outside and got some air and let it all out. Soon my husband came to check on me. I didn't need to say a word. He knew everything in my mind. That i would never see the day my niece stood there again in that church in a white dress for her wedding. Even more upsetting that I would never see our 4 year old daughter make her communion. Well, on my Birthday 4/25, my beautiful angelic daughter made her first communion. This time there were no tears just overwhelming joy that I was there to celebrate and be the proud parent and help her do her hair in the morning. My whole family was there...it was a good day....even living under this cloud there can be good days....

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